Review of “Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic — and What We Can Do About It” by Jennifer Breheny Wallace

by Tang Siqi

One of my New Year's resolutions was to read at least 8 books focused on helping my career. I've had a lot of fun picking books that were relevant to my career personally but also have broader appeal for all middle school teachers and educators. This book powerfully resonated with me, and I think it has been my favorite so far.

Wallace examines the growing societal obsession with achievement, particularly in affluent communities where children feel pressure to excel in every sphere—academics, athletics, extracurriculars. This culture, she argues, can lead to anxiety, depression, and burnout, as children internalize the belief that their worth is tied to performance. The antidote, Wallace proposes, lies in helping children feel that they "matter"—that they are valued not for what they accomplish, but for who they are and how they contribute meaningfully to the lives of others.

This reframing is essential, not only for children but also for adults, particularly healthcare professionals. Achievement-based thinking can permeate all aspects of life, resulting in individuals chasing goals without fully understanding why those goals matter. Wallace’s insights push readers to ask: Are we teaching our children (and ourselves) to find fulfillment in who we are becoming or merely in what we achieve?

As a high school teacher, I found it to be a very insightful book. This book offers a valuable insight into the realities of today's educational environment. Wallace explains how the constant push for success can lead to issues like stress and anxiety among students. She argues that the quest for achievement often overlooks important aspects of a young person’s development, such as creativity and emotional well-being.

From the start, Wallace explains how this pressure affects students' mental and emotional well-being. She presents stories and statistics that show how students often feel overwhelmed. As a high school teacher, I see this stress in my students daily. Wallace emphasizes that when the focus is only on grades and test scores, students may forget the joy of learning. 

One of the key messages of the book is that the education system needs to change to create a more balanced environment for students. Wallace believes that both parents and educators should encourage young people to pursue interests and activities outside academics. She suggests that students should be allowed to learn from their mistakes and not just focus on perfection. From a teacher’s point of view, this means developing teaching methods that foster creativity and critical thinking.

The book also offers solutions, which I found particularly useful. Wallace suggests that teachers and parents should focus on helping students find balance in their lives. She provides practical advice on how to encourage students to pursue their passions and interests, not just what might look good on a college application. 

Teachers can help by providing students with more supportive and understanding classroom environments. By doing so, students will likely feel more comfortable exploring their interests without the fear of failure. This aligns with my belief that education should feed curiosity and a love for learning. As a high school teacher, I try to foster a sense of community and cooperation among students. The book underscores how critical it is to make students feel understood and valued not just for their achievements but for who they are.

Overall, "Never Enough" is a thought-provoking read. Wallace's message is clear: the way forward is through understanding and compassion, not just relentless pursuit of success. Success should not come at the cost of well-being or joy. We should embrace the unique privilege of working in a field where the opportunity to matter is woven into the very fabric of what we do—and let that become the foundation of both our careers and our personal sense of fulfillment. For any educator or parent struggling with the current achievement-driven system, this book offers a new perspective and actionable steps to better support our students. Through empathy and guidance, we can create a more holistic approach to education that benefits everyone involved.